Sir Roy Alan Gardner

Hi chaps and chap-esses it’s your boy Roy here - we’re all friends so no need for the titles! (Mines a SIR). I was appointed Chairman of Serco in 2015 to help the company ‘repair its fortunes’ and boy have I: the test and trace fiasco, concealed profits from electronic tagging, losing the UK’s nuclear warhead contract, but profits still up! Sadly all good things come to an end, and this Asylum Landlord initiative is one of my final hurrahs, as I’ve decided to step down as Chairman of Serco (ASAP please lads?). I’ve been described as quiet, shy, modest and handsome: you can even find me in the National Portrait Gallery! As I mention in my wikipedia entry I was brought up in the ‘humble surroundings’ of Surrey, with early jobs as a paperboy and at the local bean factory. I made my name (and title) in the aftermath of British Gas being privatised and demerged through the 1980s and 90s, becoming CEO of Centrica PLC (the multinational that owns British Gas, Scottish Gas and Bord Gáis Energy in Ireland) in 1997. Having never fulfilled my boyhood dream of playing for Manchester United, I took over as chairman in 2001 before being usurped by those dratted Glazers a few years later (let’s call it a draw boys). My tenure at Plymouth Argyle was a bit more of an own goal, as during my chairmanship a series of mismanaged debts and deficits left the club close to being liquidated, with staff not paid for almost a year (oops!). Luckily, I’m more successful with defence off the football field, also chairing Pressure Technologies, “the principal provider of inspection and testing services to the MoD for ongoing cylinder performance and safety management on the Astute, Vanguard and Trafalgar classes of nuclear submarines”, along with the British Navy. When I watch the news in Yemen or wherever I often marvel at how some of the people we are housing at Serco and Asylum Landlords might have been bombed by those very missiles, that’s what I call full spectrum! I’m excited to finally see Asylum Landlords getting the credit they deserve, and will continue to champion them from my various retirement homes.


making housing vile

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